I think we all have times where we realize we have lost so many loved ones, and friends seem few and far between. Where we feel weary and worn out. Like the parade has passed us by.
That is how I was feeling. Alone and lonely. I was driving in to work and was inside my head as usual. Myriad thoughts running through. I was thinking, am I just having a blue day? Am I a bit down today? No, the words I heard in my head were 'inexorable sadness'. I have a pretty good vocabulary but I wasn't sure I was using that word correctly. So once I was in a place where I could look it up I saw that inexorable meant relentless or unyielding. Yessir, that is exactly how I was feeling.
In times past, alcohol or drugs would have blunted those sharp edges for a while. A few drinks and I could just forget what my life was, or more honestly wasn't. I was on a road to nowhere and then I met someone who had journeyed before me. I met One who loved me in a way that I could not begin to comprehend.
I have come to realize that no matter how bad things seem or feel, they are temporary. And that no matter what I go through I will never walk away from the One who walks with me.
I am reminded of the scripture in John 6:60-68 which talk about when some of Jesus' disciples became offended by some of the things he was saying. Many left Him and never returned. Jesus then said to the twelve, "Will you also go away?" And Peter's answer was "to whom shall we go?"
That is how I feel. Hard times come. Loved ones pass away. Our friends disappear. Our health fails. Prayers seem to take so long to be answered. But where else could I go? Nowhere. Because where Jesus is, is the somewhere that God wants me to be. In His presence, even in sadness is fullness of joy. And that joy becomes our strength to walk out of those dark moments that seem to overwhelm.
And in one of those mystifying twists that only God can arrange, no matter how I feel, His love will never leave me alone. Romans 8:35-39 says that nothing, not tribulation or distress or persecution shall separate us from the love of Christ. That through it all, because of His love for us we are more than conquerors.
If NOTHING can separate us from His love that also means our sadness, or disappointments or fears.
We are no longer on the road to nowhere; we are on that straight and narrow path that leads us to our ultimate destination. Not a road to nowhere, but a street that is paved with gold.